Anybody for getting a patent for a handkerchief ?

A few days ago, I subtly commented on the IPR manic. It is best explained when I take a piece of news (off CIOL) and you'll see what I mean...

BANGALORE: McAfee, Inc. today announced that the United States Patent and Trademark Office have granted the company U.S. Patent 7,069,330 entitled "Control of Interaction between Client Computer Applications and Network Resources."

It covers various structures, programs and processes for determining whether an application is authorized to access a network or network resource. This is accomplished by utilizing a policy for facilitating the decision as to whether an application is authorized or not.

Now, if you thought that the above was pretty obvious way in how one would implement a security policy, wait till you read the next paragraph !

According to a specific example of the patented technology, a network access request from an application may initially be detected. An application policy file or field may thus be utilized to determine if such application is authorized to access the network or network resource. In one of many possible embodiments, an access flag field may be used which contains data specifying whether the application is allowed access to the particular network entity.

Wow !. I'm now seriously contemplating on getting a patent for a handkerchief... the specific example would read as follows

A irritiation in the nostrils may be detected by the hair follicles or nerve endings and the standard piece of cloth may be utilized to wipe off goo. In one of many possible embodiments, a mongram or initial may be used as a flag which specifies whether the owner is allowed to access the particular human element.....

What next ?

Things I learnt today ?
I learnt that the Tommy Hilfinger / Oprah Winfrey spat on Indians is a hoax (pretty late learning I thought)